Virtual Surf Report: The Animated Genius of Han Hoogerbrugge at www.hoogerbrugge.com

Wednesday, 21 December 2005

We're visiting the insanely compelling, disturbing, delicious, interactive art world of animation genius Han Hoogerbrugge today. His site is www.hoogerbrugge.com, and you really need to budget several hours and multiple visits to this wonderland. In particular, head for his NEUROTICA series, and spend a vast amount of time delighting yourself with it.

The pieces are essentially self-portraits in which the viewer manipulates the artist.

He's made all of the music and all of the art. And you've GOT to visit this site.

Hear a podcast of today's radio broadcast at http://schmucknews.libsyn.com.

Virtual Surf Report: Overheard in New York

Tuesday, 20 December 2005

Today’s site is Overheard In New York, dedicated to reporting overheard snippets of conversations from the great city. There are some absolute lulus on this site, but it’s not to be missed. Here’s an example of two people on one of New York’s trains.

GIRL: We aren’t underground, are we?

GUY: Look over there; there’s the sun.

Listen to a full podcast of the insert at http://schmucknews.libsyn.com/

Virtual Surf Report: Magnatune.com and Google Maps

I'm back on the radio with a 'Virtual Surf Report' on SAfm 104--107 at around 12:30pm weekdays

Yup. Jon Gericke called me up recently to say, 'Hey, Roy, wanna be on the radio again?'

So I said, 'Yeah.'

And he said, 'Okay. I'm on the midday slot for the next few weeks, during the holiday period, and I'd love you to do a "virtual surf report", a sort of "how to go on holiday without leaving the comfort of your armchair" thing. You up for it?'

So I said, 'Yeah.'

So Friday was my first slot, and I talked about Google Maps. I found myself in San Francisco, hunting down sushi bars.

Today I'm talking about the most awesome music site I've discovered called Magnatune. The dude running it has the best deal with his artists. They get 50% of all money their music earns. But better than this... the person buying the music gets to choose how much they pay. Killer stuff. I've already bought 3 albums from the site, and I will be buying many more.

You can listen to SAfm via live audio streaming. Just go to the SAfm website and click on the 'listen live' link. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to work with Firefox, so crank it up in Internet Explorer.

Do not go and see LADIES NIGHT at the Theatre on the Square in Sandton. Unless you're into leaving during the interval.

Oh my sweet god.

I didn't want to write this blog post. Cos I didn't want to come across as massively negative and scathing. And you know... the actors WERE doing their best, and some of them were very funny, and there were some laugh-out-loud moments and all that.

But really. Somebody with some objectivity needs to inform the public (you, me, us) and the director (Maralin Vanrenen) that this show -- LADIES NIGHT -- sucks. Bigtime. It's embarassing.

This show is being staged in the heart of extremely wealthy tourist-ville, Sandton. This is where massively wealthy Italians and Spaniards and Germans and Britishers congregate to pick up high-class prostitutes and take in the local culture.

And they're subjected to this!!! And the out-of-proportion sculpture of Madiba.

These people must be fleeing the country saying, 'Oh my sweet god! I saw THE WORST SHOW EVER in South Africa! And the worst thing is that the audience LOVED it!!!!'

The show has been on for a few weeks now, and nobody has told Anitra THAT HER VOICE IS TOO SOFT AND CANNOT BE HEARD FROM THE FIFTH ROW!!!! Director! Sort this out!!! Come on! If your lead actress can't be heard, you don 't have a play! And comic acting 101, Anitra -- DO NOT SPEAK WHEN THE AUDIENCE IS LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somebody needs to tell the fake New Zealander that his performance would be amazing if he just brought it down a notch. He's personable. He's interesting to look at. But it looks like he's been directed to present himself in the worst possible way.

I left during the interval. I couldn't stay a moment longer. I'm embarassed. And this show is going to run for an entire year, touring the country!!! Come on, people. Don't make amateur drama in professional venues for paying audiences. You're bringing us down.

I have a bad taste in my mouth as I type this. Lemme find some good things to say.

I loved the set design. Very lovely stuff. Professional. Evocative. Interesting. Made great use of the space.

I loved Steven van Niekerk's performance in the lead role. Very commanding. Great comic timing.

I reallly laughed when Brendan van Rhyn did his piece in the toga. VERY funny. VERY VERY funny.

And the bass guitarist dude's performance when he tried to get his shoes off was superb. Not to mention his enthusiastic demonstration of how he makes love to his wife. A good laugh.

I must add that the audience seemed to be loving this show. And the house was about three-quarters full.

So maybe I'm a cynical bastard. But I really have to say my say. Just cos everyone seemed to be loving it doesn't mean that it couldn't be better. The show IS amateurish. And it doesn't HAVE to be. These performers deserve better direction. And the audience deserves to see this show as it COULD be done.

If we continue to accept this level of production, we'll continue to get this kind of production. And in time we'll start believing that this is great stuff.

Oh. Hang on. We already love MADAM & EVE on television. And SCANDAL. And INTERROGATION ROOM.

Case closed?

Quick question: does the layout of this blog look broken in your browser?

Hiya. I've just looked at my blog in Internet Explorer for the first time in about a year, and it looks prety severely broken to me. My default browser is Firefox. And since I upgraded, my blog has been looking a little odd.

I'm keen to hear from people if the layout looks 'off' to you. If it does, I'll try and fix it. Don't quite know what's gone wrong though. Darn.

Please let me know in the comments field, or by email. I'm on schmucknews@gmail.com.

Thanks for your help.

Blue skies
Love
Roy

2005-12-11 Lionel Murcott's birthday party, Blairgowrie

2005-12-11 Emilia Murcott
Originally uploaded by royblumenthal.

S and I trundled off on Sunday to Lionel Murcott's birthday party. He's an amazing artist, and he has some amazing artists as friends.

I have about eight of his works on my walls.

The picture here is Emilia, his spunky 16-year-old daughter. She has dreadlocks. And as a result, she's leaving her current high school in favour of one with more liberal hairdo policies.

Also present at the party were Roger Ballen, Tinus Horn, and Alistair Findlay. All of them are major artists in their fields.

Lionel, Tinus and Alistair were the core members of a portrait circle which disbanded some time back. They're reforming, and I'll once more be part of it. Yay!

Cafe, Melville

2005-12-10 s at cafe (drawing by S)
Originally uploaded by royblumenthal.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Service: * * * 1/2
Food: * * * *
Ambience: * * * 1/2
Babe Count: * * * * *

Phone: +27 11 482 4309
Address: 66 4th Avenue, Melville

S has just come back from boxing, and we're hungry. But we're tired of the same old places.

Which makes me think of CAFE in Melville. It's got a delightful porch, with comfie chairs.

And even though we're in the middle of a blazing summer here in Johannesburg, it's damn chilly.

'Look at that!' says S.

She's pointing at a blanket draped over each of the chairs on the porch.

'Do you want the red one or the white one?' I ask.

She's wearing red today, so she chooses the red one.

I order spicy Moroccan lamb stew with couscous, and she goes for the grilled salmon with steamed vegetables.

The food arrives, and I'm happier than a lamb frolocking in a field. The plate is not overly large, and the portion is just the right size. (I'm very much against HUGE portions. They put me off. In this case, the amount is right. And I'm VERY hungry.)

S takes a bite of her salmon. 'Roy,' she says, 'this is the best fish I've tasted in South Africa since I've been back from London.'

She spent about five years living in London. Now that she's back, she's already making waves in the musical theatre field. (Yes, yes, yes... I'm proud of her. So sue me for bragging, okay?)

We're both very puzzled about how quiet the place is. So I say to Raymond, the manager, 'You guys really should be a lot busier than you are. Is it always like this?'

He says, 'Today is out of the ordinary. We're normally really bustling.'

I say, 'Maybe it's got something to do with this cold weather?'

S says, 'This is the best meal I've had in months!'

And then I take a snap of her on my phone, and she asks if she can do a self-portrait. Which she does. And that's the pic I've used to illustrate this post. Talented gal, huh? She sings and dances and laughs too.

Up close and personal with Nick Durandt, South African boxing legend

2005-12-03 Nick Durandt Close Up
Originally uploaded by royblumenthal.

So it's no secret that my girlfriend S is doing some serious boxing training at Nick Durandt's Boxing World. And every now and then I go and sit on the sidelines with my palmtop and do drawings.

So it's Saturday, and Nick's there. And he hasn't met me before. And I walk up to him and go, 'Hey Nick. I'm Roy. S's boyfriend. Can I take a pic of you on my cellphone as reference? I wanna do a sketch of you?'

He's no stranger to photos. In his office, there's a snap of him with Joe Frazier (signed), and another of him with Don King (signed), and another of him and Madiba (signed).

He looks at me as though I'm a punching bag, and he's working out what size gloves to hit me with. 'Sure,' he says, and I snap a pic.

And I sit on the couch while S gets into the ring with Evans and spars lightly. I draw. And Damien, Nick's kid comes to see what I'm up to.

'Can I give you some advice?' he asks.

He's 14 years old. And S says he whacks the punch bag like a pro. I say, 'Absolutely.'


He says, 'My dad normally wears the hat much lower on his forehead.'

So I make an adjustment and show him.

'Ya. That's it.'

He's going to be a cricketer when he grows up. (His mom doesn't want him to box. But he still trains anyway.)

I show Nick. 'Hey,' he says. 'Not bad.' I show him the pics I've done of Evans and Mr Jones. 'Not bad,' he says. 'Do you do action pictures? I've got a few photos. I'll bring them. Maybe you can come round and do a few. We could sell them at fights. Fans dig this sort of thing.'

In the ring, S catches Evans on the side of the head, and he drops like a stone. Of course, she didn't 'catch' him, and he didn't realllllly drop. He's just humouring her.

Oh. Hang on. On second thoughts, maybe she did take him out. I'd better be careful what I say! She's a machine!

Roy performing in a piece of physical theatre at the Civic in Braamfontein

2005-12-01 Daniel Buckland
Originally uploaded by royblumenthal.

2005-12-01 Daniel Buckland

This afternoon I was at the Actors' Centre at the Civic Theatre in Braamfontein. I'm part of a small group of people rehearsing a piece of physical theatre directed by Daniel Buckland, son of Andrew Buckland.

We're performing the piece on Monday at the News Cafe at the Civic. So get your butt down there, and you'll have a good laugh.

I was performing with a totalllllly numb bottom right hand side of my mouth, thanks to a visit to my dentist, Ian Watt.

I've been having hectic tooth pain. Turns out that many of my old fillings have developed leaks. This is a polite way of saying that they're not really sealed, and that organic matter is able to enter the tooth, leading to decay. And decay leads to moral torpitude. And that leads to supporting George Bush. And I wouldn't want that. So out with the old. In with the new.

It's quite tough doing hardcore sweaty physical theatre with a completely numb mouth, I wanna tell you. It screws with the balance. And everbody thinks ya might have had one or two beers too many at lunch.

Your search for a new dentist just ended

2005-12-01 Dr Ian Watt, Dentist Extraordinaire
Originally uploaded by royblumenthal.

2005-12-01 Dr Ian Watt, Dentist Extraordinaire

Your search for a new dentist just ended. If you live in Gauteng, of course. I've been to a good few dentists in my time.

Until recently, looking into my mouth was like a treasure hunter's wet dream. Metal everywhere. But Dr Watt has been systematically refilling my teeth with a composite material that bonds directly to the tooth. If the dentist does it properly.

If your dentist has used composite in your teeth, and has NOT used a rubber dental dam to prevent saliva from entering the hole, then you had best get a new dentist damn fast. Cos that means your fillings are NOT bonded, and they ARE leaking, and decay is setting in.

I'm hoping Ian Watt will be around for a very long time. Look him up at the Wellness Centre in Bryanston. You might not recognise him from this pic though.