Monday, October 31, 2005

How To Get Maximum Benefit From Your Advertising Agency

This little primer is something I wrote for Potion's first client. (Potion is a small design agency that I co-founded.) We realised that their expectations and ours weren't meshing very well. So here's what we sent them. They partly liked what we had to say. But they were also quite unhappy with some of it. Nevertheless, if you want your relationship with your ad agency to flourish, you'd best take a look at this piece. -- Roy Blumenthal

1. Your ad agency has your best interests at heart.

This has to be the number one premise that a client and agency work from. As a client, your goal is to get great work out of your agency, so that you can flourish. Your agency wants to give you great work, cos they want you to flourish, cos they want to build a long, beautiful, mutually fruitful relationship that goes long into the future. All agencies want great clients, and they want to keep them.

So, the premise HAS to be that we're working together for the same goals.

This means several things. When your ad agency asks you difficult questions, you need to assume that they're coming at those questions to help you. They're not trying to show you up. They're not trying to throw hurdles in your path. They're trying to help you get clarity. Sometimes they have experience that you might benefit from. If you assume the best, then you'll answer those questions clearly.

If you assume the worst, then you'll answer those questions reactively, and progress will not be made.

If you find yourself reacting to something that your agency has told you or asked you, let your first line of attack be to reflect on things. We're on your side.

2. Your business benefits when you know exactly what objectives you want to achieve with a particular piece of communication. Your advertising benefits when you communicate with your agency.

Advertising is never general. It always has a specific objective or set of objectives. Each ad should have a single minded purpose. If an ad has more than one purpose, it is a bad ad. One purpose means one ad. Two purposes means two ads.

If you don't know what your purpose is, then you have a generic ad. A broad ad. If you say to your ad agency, 'We want an ad that'll get EVERYONE to call us,' then you haven't found your purpose.

Know your purpose. Write it down. Examine it. Plumb the depths. You might THINK you know what you want, but maybe there's more to be discovered if you take the time to think hard about what you're after.

Use these four questions when you're setting your purpose:

o Who is the target of this ad?
o What are we offering to them?
o What proof to we have to back up this offer?
o What do we want them to feel and do once they've experienced this ad?

If you don't have CLEAR answers to each of those four questions, you're not ready to make an ad.

Once you have those answers, put them down in writing. A written brief is the only way an ad agency can proceed. There is too much room for error in conversation.

And remember, if your brief is unclear, your agency will do one of two things... either they'll create an ad based on the unclear message, or they'll come back to you with questions. It's your job as a good client to answer those questions clearly.

3. Just cos you're paying someone doesn't mean they must do what you want.

Contrary to popular belief, the ad agency does not give the client what the client WANTS. It is the job of the ad agency to give the client what the client NEEDS. Needs and wants are very different things.

Just cos you THINK you want 'everybody to call' does not mean this is what you need. This can sink your business faster than you can blink. One-hundred calls in an hour are impossible for two individuals in a small office to take. And the one or two people who can't get through MIGHT be the ones you NEED to speak to. You'll never know if you're trying to answer the phones all the time.

When you say 'Jump', your ad agency's job is to say, 'Why? What do you want to achieve by asking us to jump?' It is not our job to say, 'How high?'

If you want people to help grow your business, treat us as professionals. We have other clients. And we have lives. We are not at your beck and call. However, we ARE available to do work for you on a reasonable schedule.

Just as you have objectives in your business, we have objectives in ours. A client who insists on hundreds of face-to-face meetings is wasting everyone's time. Email is one of the wonders of the modern world. Please use it. A client who gives tight deadlines doesn't allow an agency to do great work. Whenever reactivity is at play, quality suffers.

4. Agencies are very happy to fire clients. Having cash flow is not the same as making a profit.

We all want to work wisely and productively together. Bearing in mind that we're professionals is a good way of keeping that objective on the table.

Money is also trivial. In most cases, ad agencies look for clients who pay realistic amounts of money for services rendered. They also look for multiple clients. If a client wants an agency to be dedicated to them exclusively, they really need to consider having an internal department doing that work.

Just cos you're paying, doesn't mean we're hopping around on the end of a piece of string.

5. Bring your agency into things VERY early on in the process, so that we can share our thinking with you, and so that we can plan our time.

The more lead time we have, the better result you'll get. Many clients THINK that they're giving their agency a reasonable lead time. But they can always involve the agency earlier in the process.

As soon as you even START thinking about a project, bring the agency into that thinking.

Do this via email. Meetings are not productive for this, unless they're formal brainstorms. And brainstorms are billable. Our expertise is at your disposal. But it's serious expertise built up over years. So we're going to charge you for it.

6. When an ad runs, there are consequences. Have a clear plan on how you will deal with those consequences.

Quite simply put, an advert is just the tip of a marketing iceberg. Unless you have a plan on how to deal with response, you will be floundering, and will be caught on the back foot.

Have a marketing plan and an action plan for every advert you run.

If you're running a classified ad asking for agents, know exactly what you're going to ask those people who call you so that you can quickly evaluate whether or not they're likely to be suitable. Know exactly what you're going to do when you meet them face-to-face. What documents must you photocopy? What must they sign? What happens when you accept them? What happens if your reject them? Do you need to offer them tea or coffee or drinks?

Know your breakevens. The numbers count. What response will justify the cost of the ad? How will you know if it succeeded or not?

If your ad agency asks you hard questions about how you plan to deal with the consequences, be prepared to show them your marketing plan. If you don't have one, you're going to be in trouble. (You're not going to be in trouble with your ad agency. You're going to be in trouble with your business. Cos you'll have a host of unpredictable results that might hurt very much.) Plan so that you can have upsides.

It is your ad agency's job to know what you're expecting. And they're supposed to help you meet realistic expectations.

7. When you don't know something, ask. Humility leads to knowledge.

Nobody knows everything. That's why we ask questions, and why we learn. We all want to know more. And we all want to be better at what we do.

A good ad agency wants to feed their clients with knowledge and expertise. It should be the goal of every ad agency to make themselves redundant to their clients. The more the client knows about advertising, the better the work the agency can deliver.

If you don't know something, ask. Humility has a way of generating goodwill. Arrogance has the opposite effect. When an ad agency deals with a client who is arrogant, they tend to think, 'Hmmmm... this guy knows very little. He doesn't WANT to know anything. All he wants is for us to kiss his butt. On balance, I don't think I want to work with him. It's a bit too unpleasant. There are better clients out there in the world.'

On the other hand, a client who says, 'I really don't understand why you're saying this particular thing. Would you mind sharing your knowledge with me?' has a very different response. We'll movemountains when we know someone genuinely wants to know something.

The business shelf at most major bookshops is a goldmine. Not just for advertising. But for marketing and business process too. Read voraciously. Even if you just skim chapter headings while standing at the bookshelf in the store. (One chapter heading that I remember vividly from a sales book is this: 'If you don't HAVE an assistant, you ARE the assistant.')

You do not have the time to NOT read. Do it. Learn. The more you learn, the better client you'll be, and the more successful you'll become. And the easier you'll be to work with.

Our job is to try to understand YOUR business as much as we can. We should become a valuable partner in your business, and that means WE need to be humble too. We need information from you in order to make the best communications.

8. What to do when your ad agency doesn't want to work with you.

There will be times when you find that your ad agency no longer wants to work with you. This could come about for many reasons.

One reason could be that you're simply a horrible client. You give unrealistic deadlines. You make unrealistic demands. You ask your agency to do unethical work. You ask them to do work that is not in your best interests.

Another reason could be that you've outgrown your agency. Perhaps your business has grown to a size that the agency can't cope with.

Yet another reason might be that your business has remained small. You're not able to pay a realistic amount for the services your ad agency is providing.

Another reason might be that the agency has picked up business that is a conflict in interest with yours.

Whatever the reason, sometimes a divorce is necessary.

All parties need to get together and chat, and then go separate ways, with all outstanding work either dealt with or delegated. Often, the agency leaving the client will have recommendations of other agencies who might be more suitable.

9. What to do if you want to continue working with your agency.

When things are going right, you might want to contiue your relationship. Know that storminess happens in the best of relationships. Keep cards on the table. Communicate with your agency. Let them know what they're doing right. Let them know what results you're getting off their efforts.

Always bear in mind that it's always a two-way street. What's working for you needs to work for them. And vice versa.

Communication is the key here.

Sunday, October 30, 2005

My Flat, Cresta

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Service: * * * 1/2
Food: * * *
Ambience: * * * * *
Babe Count: * * * * *

It's not that this Coffee-Shop Schmuck HASN'T been out and about. It's just that I'm now in a fulltime relationship, and she's moved into my place temporarily, and I'm digging it tons.

We've just had a Fontana chicken takeaway with a salad from Panarotti's, which was QUITE delicious. She's busy practising her singing for an audition, and I'm dreaming of having some tea and a TIM TAM. (It's a biscuit imported from Australia, available only in certain Pick 'n Pay supermarkets. If you're interested... head for the Melville branch at Campus Square.)

I've been doing tons of things.

For one, I've bought a tablet PC -- the Toshiba Tecra M4. And it's a serious wet dream.

For another, I've acted in a corporate video, which was damn cool. And I've been doing voice-over work too. I'm getting busy, mon.

For another, I delivered a creativity seminar for 23 teachers from various schools. Two of them were hotties. Hmmm. S was going to come to the seminar, but a voice-over session came up, and she had to miss it. Sad. It would have been nice for the two hotties to see me with an uber hottie. Heheheh.

For another, I finally wrote a redraft of my feature screenplay, HOME. It's now sitting online at, waiting for members of Francis Ford Coppola's online filmmaking community to crit. So far, I've had four people read it, and no crits yet.

I've also started gearing up to expand my ka huna massage practice. Did a massage two days ago. And loved being in the flow of it again. I've listed myself on So if you want a ka huna massage, I'm available on Wednesday and Thursday nights, and on Saturday afternoons. The charge is R400 for a one and-a-half hour session.

And I've been accepted into THE ACTOR'S CENTRE as a full member, which is really quite something. I'm taking classes with Daniel Buckland in physical comedy. We do a small show on Thursday, and my little Golem-like creature plays a neat role in the unfolding story.

In other news, Dick Richards, the author of a book that changed my life some years ago, has released a new book. It's called IS YOUR GENIUS AT WORK? And it's available for sale at Some months ago he contacted me and asked me if I'd be willing to write some comments on the book. He forwarded me a substantial wad of the book, and I loved it.

Here's what I'm quoted as saying on the first page of the book:

"I've found it easier to relate to clients and friends having named my genius. And I find it's a useful tool to offer to people so that they know how best to utilize my skills." -- Roy Blumenthal, Artist-at-Large

Dick and I have been in touch for years. I wrote to him ages ago asking if it would be okay for me to create a weekend seminar based on his work. He was delighted to let me do so. I ran a test weekend, and it was awesome. Ten of my friends benefited from learning the names of their genius. Mine is 'Guiding the Flow'.

I strongly recommend that you buy his book. And head for his blog. His thinking is life-changing. He's at

He's asked for guest bloggers, and one of my pieces will be appearing on his site sometime soon.

Thanks to Dick, I'm in a serious piece of re-evaluation space right now. I'm busy looking at how my blog comes across in the eyes of the world. The image I'm giving people of myself. I'm ready to take myself to the next level of earning, and the next level of making a contribution to the world.

So watch this space. Soon I'll be offering my services as a life coach and as a creativity coach. I've been doing some informal sessions with friends and acquaintances, and soon I'll be ready to start charging for it.

That's about it for now.

I'll catch you when I've got time.

Blue skies

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

My Flat, Cresta

Tuesday (later on in the evening), October 4, 2005

Service: * * *
Food: * * *
Ambience: * * * * *
Babe Count: N/A

Something I wanted to write about earlier, but SURVIVOR interrupted...

Isn't it interesting that I've made just over US$20 from Clicksor ads?

The interesting thing about this is that just 8 cents of those dollars come from THIS site.

The rest of the revenue is coming from the sister blog to this...

It's a blog that I occassionally update showing the search terms used to reach my site. Because I'm a bit foul-mouthed in THIS blog, I sometimes use risque words. Which get logged by search engines.

So when someone does a search for "self licking contortionist", the search engines don't realise that the word "self" in one article of mine, and the word "licking" in another entry, and the word "contortionist" in yet another ARE ACTUALLY NOT CONNECTED. Dumb search engines! And YES. That's an ACTUAL term used to find my page.

Now because I'm listing the search terms, every time someone searches for one of the terms on the list, my site comes up as a hit. And the more I update my site, the stronger I become on the search engines. It's a kinda self-propogating thing. A vicious circle, if you will.

I've figured that I oughta make some spending money off this phenomenon. Hence all the odd advertising you'll find on that site.

But the INTERESTING thing about this whole advertising phenomenon is that people who visit my actual blog ARE NOT clicking through on ANY of the adverts.

But strange perverts looking for depraved search strings ARE clicking. I don't REALLLLLY know what this means. But I suspect it means that my loyal readers aren't interested in advertising. While the one-hit wonders are just looking for anything that'll give them a fix on their kinks.

Please lemme know in the comments box if you'd like me to remove all advertising from this site and leave it all on the search terms site. Does the advertising here bother you? Does it bother you that I've got kinky stuff on the search site? Lemme know what you think.

My Flat, Cresta

Tuesday, October 4, 2005

Service: * * *
Food: * * *
Ambience: * * * * *
Babe Count: N/A

It's amazing how blogging energy gets sapped when one is busy on multiple projects AND in love with a beautiful woman. Ah well. She's in Cape Town this very second. Having just flown there from Port Elizabeth. She's on the cast of a piece of corporate theatre I've just written. Had the first show last night. The audience reportedly loved it! Yay!!!

(And no... I had nothing to do with her winning the role. She auditioned just like everyone else. And the work is flooding in for her. She's been offered two other roles in quick succession. Wow!)

That design client I pitched for on behalf of POTION, the design company I co-created some while back with Denis and Chanel... We won the pitch. Against nine other design agencies. Yeeehaaaa!

But we didn't know what we were letting ourselves in for. We've been working REALLLLY hard on the job. Major hours. And the client is young and bullish, and doesn't reallllly know how design briefs work. So it's quite exhausting for us to be both doing the work AND educating the client as to how to be a client. But hey. It feels great.

I've been investigating tablet PCs after reading positive things about them on Robert Scoble's blog. The crazy thing about South African computer distributors is that they offer only the most rudimentary factory configuration. Many of the companies I've spoken to say this...

"We don't really sell many tablet PCs here. No demand." Words to that effect.

No frigging wonder, man! Take the Toshiba Tecra M4. The configuration I need, and CAN GET OFF THE WEB if I were living in the United States of A, is: 2 gigaHz processor, 100 gig harddrive, 1 gig of RAM. The one that's becoming available here has a 1.76 gigaHz processor, a 60 gig harddrive, and 512 megs of RAM. What are these fuckers thinking???? Seriously!!!

I need this machine to be my computer. Not a subsidiary computer. Not a backup computer. My MAIN computer. So offer it to me with muscle, and I'll buy it. I'll even pay bucketloads of cash for it. Cos I need it. I'll even buy the damn thing from the States and risk paying vast amounts of money on customs duties. (What I'm NOT keen on doing is buying it from the States and having some stripped down shell arriving and me having no recourse to justice. That's what's stopping me from pressing, "Proceed to checkout". )

There are two local resellers doing their best to get Toshiba and Acer to come to the party. (Acer in South Africa has the TMC 312. But inexplicably, when I phoned head office to ask about the more potent 314, they claimed that I must be making some sort of mistake. They'd never heard of it. And, "It's not on our product roll-out roadmap for the next six months," they told me.

And that's it. No willingness to phone their buddies somewhere else in the world and say, "Hey, we've got a customer whose underpants are frothing with readiness to buy this machine. Please ship us one."

We shall have to see how this one plays out.

(If you're interested, I need a muscly tablet pc cos I want to do some video editing on the thing. Which means it needs quite a lot of power in all sorts of areas. I also want to take my digital drawing up a notch by using Alias Sketchbook Pro. I can't wait!!!)

Okay. SURVIVOR is now on. Time for me to settle back and yearn for S.