Spaza Gallery, Troyeville

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Service: * * *
Food: * * * *
Ambience: * * *
Babe Count: * * * *

Drew Lindsay, owner of the Spaza Gallery, organises his Sunday lunch chefs to make soup for us on Thursday evenings for the portrait circle. We're all chafing to eat. But in the meantime, Beaujolais, our model, is freezing her breasts off for us.

The thermostat in the heater isn't working, and she's opted to go topless. So we're getting a real standout performance from her nipples.

And hey, this is one impressive woman. "All this weight," she tells us, "comes from being on a medication that replicates pregnancy. Over the last fourteen years, my body has simulated pregnancy fourteen times."

She's got quite a bloated tummy and humungoid breasts. These are the biggest breasts I've seen with my own eyes. Vast. Enormous. Hanging. Absolutely amazing to draw. And she's a natural. Not an ounce of self-consciousness. About eight artists on the floor tonight. Two of them babes. Yummy. Angie is particularly scrumptious. She's an animal healer. Learning reiki for pets.

The food arrives. Two different soups tonight. Tomato and orange in one pot, and potato and leek in the other. Both are astounding. Worth every cent of the the fifteen bucks we each pay for the privilege. Then we get back to the artmaking.

Beaujolais used to be a nursing sister in surgery. "I've worked with Chris Barnard once," she says. He's the world-famous heart surgeon who pioneered heart transplantation. "What a man!" she says. "Had an eye for the ladies, hey. You didn't want to be caught in the laundry room with him!"