Thursday, February 09, 2006

CASSETTE, a new band fronted by Jon Savage -- awesome


S and I went off to the Bassline in Newtown last weekend with her buddies Paul and Justin Dempsey. Justin's here from London, and he's a pretty hot muso and producer. He'd heard a track by CASSETTE on the radio, and thought they might be the freshest South African band he's heard.

So when we heard they were opening for SQUATTA CAMP, we had to go check em out.

I can say this... CASSETTE is pretty much the best South African band I've heard. I can say this... I'm listening to their first cd, 'Welcome Back to Earth' on repeat, and I'm loving it. They sound a little like late Manic Street Preachers, mixed with a bit of Pulp's attitude. I dig them. Deluxe.

Their stage presence is delicious. Attitude. Angle. Real skill. Jon Savage has a killer voice.

And when he punched the punching bag with Robert Mugabe's face stuck to it while singing 'Get in the Ring', and the bag mashed off the stage and beaned a photographer almost slicing her head open but not quite and he didn't apologise, I thought, 'Hmmm... there's a chance we might actually have a South African rock star here!'

(Unfortunately, his conscience seems to have gotten the better of him, and six songs later he did apologise, but in a low key way. So maybe he CAN be a rock star.)

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

My first formal mentoring client

I had a meeting yesterday at a coffee-shop in Northgate Shopping Centre with a poet buddy of mine.

He has asked me to be his creativity mentor. He's putting together a one-person show of his poems, and he'd like me to keep him on track.

Yay!!!

My new tattoo design -- 'Left Arm -- property of Roy Blumenthal'

When I was very very very young, I got myself a tattoo.

How young? Eleven years old.

It's a complicated story. My mom did the good deed of having two sisters from the Epworth Village Children's Home around on some weekends, as a sort of foster parent. Maggie was about fourteen and Sharon was about sixteen.

Sharon had a boyfriend, Mark, who rode a motor bike and listened to Led Zep.

Mark also had a tattoo. And a needle. And a piece of cotton. And a pot of India Ink.

And an extensive collection of tattoo designs for me to choose from, seeing as he'd allowed me to ride his motorbike round the back lawn, and I'd spotted him hiding Sharon's panties beneath the cushion on the lounge sofa.

So I chose one of the tattoo designs.

His extensive collection ran to exactly TWO designs. A skull smoking a cigarette just didn't seem to make any sense to me, since I hated smoking, cos my mom and dad were both horribly inconsiderate smokers. I chose, instead, an utterly irrelevant Chinese Junkman.

So Mark drew the design on my upper left arm with a ballpoint pen, wound the cotton round the needle tip, dipped the needle in the ink, and began the long job of puncturing my skin. I don't recall it being all that sore. But it took about an hour.

Years later, when I was about seventeen, I tried using a scalpel to remove the tattoo. It didn't work. A few years after that, when I was in first year varsity, studying engineering, I tried again, this time using sandpaper AND a scalpel. And it mostly worked. It now looks like I have a blue-ish birthmark on my arm.

But I'm self-conscious about it, and it represents a hard and horrible childhood. So I'm going to be investing in covering it up. Hence the new design. I figure 'Left Arm -- property of Roy Blumenthal' is quite funny on first viewing, and cynically funny on second viewing, and ridiculously silly on all subsequent viewings. If I've gotta have a tattoo, it might as well be something that'll make me smile for a very long time.

And I reckon this design is neat enough to prevent me from reaching for the sandpaper.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Teaching creativity to a group of ex-prostitutes in Berea, Johannesburg

This morning I rushed off to Steve's Spar in Cresta, grabbed a basket full of brown wrapping paper, some glue, and some wax crayons, and sped through Hillbrow to Berea to the New Life Centre. There I met Linda-Michael, one of the dudes who works at the Hillbrow Community Theatre in Edith Cavell Street.

We met on the Augusto Boal FORUM THEATRE training workshop I participated in last year, and again when a group of us decided to take the training forward. He asked me if I'd like to volunteer to do some work on a project he's involved in, and I said yeah.

So we enter a block of flats, and the security dude eyes us suspicioulsy. What's the white dude doing parking a sports car out on the street in the Bronx? What's he doing entering this building??

Linda says to him, 'New Life Centre, my bra,' and we get nodded through. Some of the buildings in Berea and Hillbrow are having their foyers refurbished to make it impossible for overcrowding to take place. This is one of those places. So we have to be individually scanned through the single-person-only turnstile. Then we're trotting up the stairs carrying the stuff I bought, and a kitbag filled with magazines.

We're in. A huge space with massive windows. Bright. A view of the vast block of flats across the road. And if I crane my neck, I can just see the tail light of my car. The room is filled with laughter. And women. About 35 of them. And three or four children. On one end is the kitchen. The other has five computers and some couches. In the middle, comfie chairs filled with ex- and current-prostitutes.

Babalwa greets us. She's one of the ladies who runs the place. We sit down cross legged on the floor to have a quick briefing session. She says, 'This project helps to rehabilitate women and children who have become involved in selling sex in the human trafficking trade.' The ladies come voluntarily becaue they want out, and the project provides counselling and safe houses for them to live while they rehabilitate. Babalwa says many of the ladies present no longer work as prostitutes, but that some of them are forced to carry on in the business.

One of the things the project does for the women is teach them skills that they can use to get out of prostitution, and into more regular jobs. These are NOT high-class prostitutes earning millions and spending it all on cocaine. These are ordinary women from rural areas who can't read or write, lured to the city and enslaved by hectic guys who probably get them hooked on crack.

I outline what I've prepared for the women, and both Linda and Babalwa like what they're hearing. Of course, I'm improvising as I go, cos I couldn't reallllly prep properly without this briefing session.

We stand, and Linda calls for attention. The women gather in a circle, and we all hold hands. Linda says, 'I have brought a guest with today, and he will be doing some exciting work with us. His name is Roy. And I'll leave him to introduce himself.'

Linda teaches the women at this centre drama, and he often invites guests to facilitate workshops.

The ladies are mostly smiling, but one or two of them look like they're having a rough time in the world. About four of them are around 13 years-old.

I introduce myself. 'I'm a writer, director, producer, and actor. I also lead creativity seminars. Today we're going to have some fun, and learn a little bit about ourselves so that we can become better actors and also improve ourselves.'

So we start off with a nice warmup exercise that I learned in Daniel Buckland's class at the Actors' Centre, and soon everyone's engaged. Then we go into an Augusto Boal game in which pairs of people act as person/mirror partners. Then we go into a game where I ask everyone to make a picture of their inner beauty. They attack the magazines enthusiastically, and soon, everyone's making pictures.

We end my two-hour workshop with another Boal game... one at a time, we each leap into the centre of the circle and announce one word describing our emotional space, accompanied by a physical gesture. Everyone in the circle repeats our word and gesture twice, and the next person goes. Most of the women are excited and joyous. Two or them are quite down. This stuff stirs up hectic emotions.

Babalwa comes up to me after and asks me if I'd like to stay for lunch. I've just finished reading ACID ALEX, so I know that it's extremely rude to refuse food, so I accept, timidly looking over at the kitchen to try and work out what the food might be. If it's offal, I'm going to be in trouble deluxe. But I've accepted, so there's no backing out ot this.

Luckily, the food is a delicious lamb curry with pasta.

Linda says, 'I'd like you to come and do another workshop, Roy. This was excellent.'

One of the ladies overhears him. 'I agree,' she says.

And I say, 'I agree too. I've loved being here.'

And I come home and think about the fact that some of those girls are children. And that some sick bastards regularly pay to have sex with them.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Europa, Village Walk: Enough with the tears!

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Service: * * *
Food: * * * 1/2
Ambience: * *
Babe Count: * * 1/2

I'm sitting in Europa, Village Walk, sipping decaff cappuccino, munching on a wholewheat bagel with turkey breast on it. (Have I mentioned that since I've largely cut out high GI food around four months ago I've shed 9 kilograms?)

I've had to stop reading the book I'm currently engrossed in. It's called ACID ALEX, by Al Lovejoy, and it's his autobiography. One of my closest friends gave me a copy. He's been buying them wherever he sees them, and is handing them to his friends. It's a must-read. (Go to Al Lovejoy's site to buy a copy. He's at http://www.acidalex.com.)

The reason I've had to stop reading is simple and complex. The simple reason is that I can't see through the tears. The complex reason is that it's not terribly suave of me to have heaving shoulders and spraying tears at Europa in Village Walk.

So I'll just eat my bagel now.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

A full list of all of the Virtual Surf Reports I did for SAfm

If you listened to any of the Virtual Surf Reports I did for Jon Gericke on SAfm's 'Summer' programme over the festive season, you might want a handy list of all of the blog articles I wrote, along with the podcasts of the radio footage.

To listen to all of the podcasts, go to http://schmucknews.libsyn.com. Otherwise click on the 'podcast' link for entries you're particularly interested in.

Enjoy.

Virtual Surf Report: Bonus Link -- Aryan Kaganof's new film, SMS SUGARMAN, the world's first feature film shot exclusively using a cellphone

Virtual Surf Report: Charles Kessler's Cool Tricks & Trinkets Newsletter -- a start of the year treat

Virtual Surf Report: Setting Achievable Goals

Virtual Surf Report: Career Change for Beginners and Experts

Virtual Surf Report: Shell Geostar -- Plan Your Route Home

Virtual Surf Report: Everyone's an Expert on SOMETHING... Squidoo

Virtual Surf Report: How To Be a Blogger


Virtual Surf Report: How To Be a Virtual Artist

Virtual Surf Report: Serendipitous Surfing with Stumble-Upon

Virtual Surf Report: The Animated Genius of Han Hoogerbrugge at hoogerbrugge.com

Virtual Surf Report: Overheard in New York

Virtual Surf Report: Magnatune.com and Google Maps

Monday, January 09, 2006

Guy Kawasaki answers this question: “What are the characteristics of a great product?”

This is taken verbatim from Guy Kawasaki's blog. It's a good component of the 'AIM' portion of my creativity model. When you're finished first-phase creating, you need to evaluate your ideas. Use Guy's thinking to see if you've got some more creating you still need to do...

“What are the characteristics of a great product?” Here is the answer.

Think: DICEE

* Deep. A great product is deep. It doesn’t run out of features and functionality after a few weeks of use. Its creators have anticipated what you’ll need once you come up to speed. As your demands get more sophisticated, you discover that you don’t need a different product.

* Indulgent. A great product is a luxury. It makes you feel special when you buy it. It’s not the least common denominator, cheapest solution in sight. It’s not necessarily flashy in a Ferrari kind of way, but deep down inside you know you’ve rewarded yourself when you buy a great product.

* Complete. A great product is more than a physical thing. Documentation counts. Customer service counts. Tech support counts. Consultants, OEMS, third-party developers, and VARS count. Blogs about it counts. A great product has a great total user experience—sometimes despite the company that produces it.

* Elegant. A great product has an elegant user interface. Things work the way you’d think they would. A great product doesn’t fight you—it enhances you. (For all of Microsoft’s great success this is why it’s hard to name a Microsoft product that you’d call “great.”) I could make the point that if you want to see if a company’s products are elegant, you need only look at its chairman’s presentations.

* Emotive. A great product incites you to action. It is so deep, indulgent, complete, and elegant that it compels you to tell other people about it. You’re not necessarily an employee or shareholder of the company that produces it. You’re bringing the good news to help others, not yourself.

Monday, January 02, 2006

Virtual Surf Report: Bonus Link -- Aryan Kaganof's new film, SMS SUGARMAN, the world's first feature film shot exclusively using a cellphone

Here's an exciting piece of breaking news. SMS SUGARMAN, written by, directed by, edited by, starring, cult film phenomenon Aryan Kaganof, has finished shooting, and is in post-production.

How do I know? A cinematographer buddy of mine, Eran Tahor, is the Director of Photography on the film, and we've just had breakfast together. His New Year's party was the wrap event for the film.

He's not allowed to tell me anything at all about the film, apart from hinting that it's going to be somewhat controversial. And he's given me the web address for the film. Head to http://smssugarman.com for more info.

The film will release in May this year, and Eran says the story rocks, and the cinematography is revolutionary.

You saw it here first!

Listen to a full podcast of this Virtual Surf Report. Or listen to all of the shows.

Virtual Surf Report: Charles Kessler's Cool Tricks & Trinkets Newsletter -- a start of the year treat

It's the last of the Virtual Surf Reports for now, so I thought I'd end off with a delicious treat for you.

Charles Kessler has been putting together a weekly roundup of the most fascinating websites in the world for 383 weeks, and he sends it out free to anyone who wants it.

The website is at www.tricksandtrinkets.com. And to subscribe for free, all you need to do is send a blank email to cooltricks-join-request@list.adventure.com.

I've been on the list for years now, and I've never once received spam as a result of subscribing, and Charles has an iron-rule not to sell users' details to anyone for any reason. (He has 190 000 subscribers, and counting.)

Let's get to some of the nuggets in the latest issue, number 383. These were chosen by his team of staff as their pick of favourite sites of 2005. They write:

Their Circular Life
You will definitely want to visit this website, which is a conceptual mixture of mindful meditation and Flash design. "Their Circular Life: An Exploration About Human Behavior" is an extremely cool project that aims to remind us to slow down our harried lives, to stop, listen, and observe the daily circle of life.

Cows With Guns
Cows give us their milk and their meat, but what do they get in return? Watch this hilarious animated music video that tells the story of revenge during a "Bovine Revolution".

The 48 Laws of Power
It is a cutthroat world out there, whether in the arena of Business, Politics or Romance. Learn valuable if not ruthless tactics from The 48 Laws of Power such as 'Win Through your Actions, Never Through Argument' and 'Crush Your Enemy Totally'.

Yoga With Cats
Kitty seeming a bit stressed lately? Spare your furniture and bliss out together at Yoga Kitty, a "practical guide" for people and pusses who seek to achieve physical, mental and spiritual ecstasy, without drugs or catnip.
In free instructional videos for clearing past karma, tapping electromagnetism and meditating, Yogi Karl and partner Yogi Ovaria -- the original Yogakitty -- show viewers how to adjust their shakras in seriocomic scenes that will have you cracking up even while the cat shreds another pillow. "Purr-fect Yoga" items are available in the online shop, like tee-shirts with the site's slogan: "Higher Consciousness, It's Not Just for Humans Anymore."
Visit Cool Tricks & Trinkets and browse through the archives for 383 weeks worth of amusing, amazing, delicious tidbits. It should keep you occupied for at least a year.

Listen to a full podcast of this report. Or listen to all of the Virtual Surf Reports.

New Year: self-portrait, with hair

It's the 1st of January 2006, and this year's looking grand already. Loads of things I'm going to be actualising in the coming 12 months.

Voice-over work. Ka huna massage. Industrial theatre production.
Creativity workshops (and my Creativity Squidoo lens).
Life-coaching (and my Goal Setting Squidoo lens.

I wish you a successful year, filled with loving, learning, joy, and abundance.

Blue skies
love
Roy

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